Oh well… I called casting and they helped me get where I was supposed to go. I was only ten minutes late and they weren’t pissed off about it at all.

In fact, I still love this show. The first time I was on was great and so was the second. This third time was no different–well, no different in general, but completely different in practice. Last two times, I was an upscale recovering drug addict. This time, I was a pedestrian with my 1968 Mustang Fastback and it was 1970-something.

I’d dragged a ton of clothes to this gig because, well, I have them, I might as well use them. And for a great change, the costumers loved me.

It was a simple scene, but since there was a flipped car and a bunch of water involved, the set-up was kind of involved. I ended up driving my car to the set before going through hair and make-up.

Since my eyebrows and the front of my hair had been burned off in a small kitchen explosion brought on by team effort stupidity between my husband and I, my hair is a little shorter than usual. When I stopped by the hair trailer, she just sighed and said there wasn’t enough for her to really do anything with it. I just kind of smashed it down and pretended I was Janet from Three’s Company. It’s too short, but I felt the need to try.

Then, in the make-up trailer, the lady started going nuts with me. She drew on eyebrows to hide my stubble and even put fake eyelashes on me to lengthen my burnt lashes. She really had a great time on my eyes and good golly, that’s the best I’ve felt since the explosion. It’s been a little over a week and it just seems to take forever for hair to grow back when you have none. At least the burns on my eyelids, lips and nose are done. They took about five days to heal. Now they’re just a little tender, but no big deal. I just want my facial hair back!

Anyhow, once I was out of there, we sat around in holding for awhile (which was air conditioned…it was getting freakin’ hot and humid outside and we were all thankful for the opportunity to stay cool) before heading to the set. I was saved as a driver and they’d planned on having me drive my Mustang, but it was too loud. Of course. Happens every time.

Instead, I drove one of the other picture cars…through a towering water effect on the first take before they toned it down for the following ones. It was another miserable black vinyl, no air-conditioning car just like my Mustang, so I kinda felt right at home. I just drank a ton of water so I didn’t dehydrate.

Basically, after those four or five takes, we were done, but they were still filming and a few of the other extras worked. I ended up reading a book and/or talking with others there. It wasn’t a bad gig at all. I just wish it wasn’t so hot. That was no fun at all.

Traffic was so bad getting there, that it took me a full two hours. I changed my route on the way home just to change the scenery a little and it took me an hour and a half despite the actual mileage was longer. I’ve certainly learned my lesson!

I got to keep the fake eyelashes as a souvenir and just before actually working, I snapped a picture with my phone. I’m really not supposed to do that, but I was careful not to get anything that’s supposed to be some big secret in the background, so hopefully I won’t get chewed out. I just really wanted to capture the brilliant make-up job I’d been given. It was kind of Twiggy-esque.

Boy was that an understatement. So far, of all the shows I’ve been in and appeared on camera, this one takes the cake. Big time. I mean, my head is as big as the screen!

The other shots may not be close-ups, but I’m still totally visible for a change. I suppose it helped that they’d placed me in the front row for some strange reason.

My husband and I saw it together and the moment I was onscreen at all, we started chuckling. Each shot built and built until we were all out cracking up because, like, my head was so freakin’ huge! It’s one of the best laughs we’ve had. We really hadn’t expected it to be like that. We’d figured okay, since I was in the front row, perhaps I was visible enough. Noooooo… I even got a close-up!

This is also one of the coolest bits I’ve been part of. I was an alien on They Are Among Us, a dead nun on Angel (in which I also had a close-up, but my head wasn’t quite as big as the screen because I was laying down and they wanted to get more blood in the shot), an insane asylum patient on The Changeling and a hooker on Cold Case and Crazy.

But on Domino… I was a recovering nymphomaniac at a Nymphomaniacs Anonymous meeting, no less. Good times!

Much of what burned on the Universal lot this year was where base camp and the set were, too. When I heard about that fire, I immediately thought of my time on Spiderman II, Superhero and Where The Truth Lies.

Here’s another of my smallest performances. It’s not quite as small as Hollywoodland, but it’s close! This is definitely the kind of shot where I wonder if I’ll actually be seen at all or was I just given a cross there ‘just in case’ the camera happens to see that deep. It’s always nice to make it in frame, though!

In these next ones, boy was I pissed when I tried to do the screen capture and there was some dumbass extra blocking the view of my car…

Yeah, that dumbass extra was me!

The way I could tell was not just by the colors on my dress, but that’s my own purse. I recognized my purse and then vaguely remembered doing this wipe, but hadn’t realized that it was part of my cross heading across the street.

I looked for myself in the other shot, but while I thought I saw myself, I wasn’t entirely sure, so I didn’t do a capture. The finished product was nothing like what was shot.

What I’ve got is what I’ve got… Me in shadow and the only reason I know that’s me is because myself and one other guy were the only ones actually walking forward in this shot. There was a lady standing near the opening, but she was sideways.

In fact, my arrow is right over her head. Whoops! Sorry, but this was my one moment in frame on Serenity, so I gotta make the best of it!

Since then, I’ve worked with the same A.D. on G-Force, but due to the nature of the shoot, I think I only saw him three times and that was mostly during lunch!

It’s not the best shot of me, but it really is me back there. Not too shabby considering I doubted getting any screen time at all except maybe this scene and lo and behold, there I am!

Although, for the amount of running around I did on Carnivale, I really thought I’d get so much as a split second in frame, but I got a whole lot of nothing. However the day I was a prop magnet, I managed to make it in frame several times. The problem was mostly that in the various angles, I was blocked by other things. Oh well. At least I got this one:

As I get the rest ready, I’ll post ‘em.

In the mean time, I’ve heard from a few people that I made it into a commercial for Raising The Bar. I have yet to see it, but that’d be awesome. Kind of like when my car made it into the trailer for Anchorman.

I got there, parked in a dirt lot before being directed up to the set, survived wardrobe with flying colors (she actually loved what I was wearing and the fact that I’d brought a ton of choices. Why can’t all costumers be that awesome?) and got the car appropriately backed in just in time for the first rehearsal. Then, the scene was shot–without any picture cars in the background–and I was sent to holding. Ummm…okay…

About an hour or so later, I was brought in to do about three takes for a tiny little scene and then ushered back out to holding. Ummm…all right…

An hour after that, I was wrapped. Ummm…yay!

I was to be playing an upscale drug addict in a high-dollar rehab center for the last three days.

Arriving at the location, I was instructed to park on a street. I think that’s a first for all the gigs I’ve been on. It was private property, but it was just strange that all the cars were on the street. Anyway, I got there okay and went to wardrobe after grabbing some breakfast. They mostly liked what I had on. After being instructed to change my tank top, they gave me another cute one to put over it plus some jewelry…and a different pair of shoes.

They were killer.

Yeah, four-inch heeled sandals. OUCH!

I could barely walk in them to begin with because they offered zero support to my ankles and the bottoms were thin enough that I could feel the pavement. When I got to the set, we were on cobblestones and tile. It was absolutely no fun.

However, before we got there, they did ask if anyone else had upscale cars and I offered up my Prowler. The hero car was also silver so there went that idea. Oh well. They still gave me some extra money for it and that was nice.

I gotta laugh at my shoe misfortune a little, though. During the exterior scene, I was asked to do a cross that involved going up the stairs around a fountain and no matter how hard I tried, I could not keep the pain from showing. I tried walking slowly, smoothly, fast, whatever and in the end they decided they didn’t want anyone walking in the background. I’m fairly certain that was mostly my fault because other people asked if my feet were hurting in those shoes.

Yeah, they were killer.

So killer, I put on my loafers immediately just to not be wearing those things.

I spent much of the rest of the day in holding except for one scene where the ADs came running out to holding hollering while pointing, “You…and you! Come now. We need you!” I hauled ass to the set while asking if I should bring the other shoes. They said I looked fine and put me in the scene at the last second. Fun stuff.

Then they needed another stand-in and I got chosen because I resembled the actor a little. I was about the right height and hair color, so I got upgraded. That was nice. I did a couple scenes including a dream sequence one where I was standing in for a sort of Lady In Waiting. While I stood in, one of the set dressers put a ribbon with flowers around me. Yay! I love souvenirs!

The next day was spent mostly by the pool. Even though they really, really, really wanted me in a bathing suit, I declined. My worry was that if they put me in a bathing suit, I’d be expected to go in the pool.

I get cold easily…and I can’t swim unless the boat I was in sank. Yeah, I’m really that pathetic.

So, with more down time I managed to read When Ghosts Speak by Mary Ann Winkowski. Great read. I highly recommend.

Oh! I almost forgot… As I was coming away from the wardrobe trailer toward the changing room Debra Messing was getting into an SUV to go up to the set. I guess she recognized me from standing in the day before and smiled at me. I was already returning her beaming grin by the time I realized that I wasn’t just smiling at some random pretty lady, I was grinning at a principal actor. Eye contact is usually a no-no, but we weren’t on set, so it must’ve been okay.

And I just gotta say, that woman is gorgeous! She smiled at me in the morning and the rest of my day was equally as wonderful.

The following day started with a bang of a different sort. I was used in the first scene along with the rest of the addicts. I don’t want to give away the scene, but lately I’ve been on a few shows where I’m required to do some real acting in the scenes. Remember all my listening on Raising The Bar? Well, that skill came in handy once more on this show… Yay!

And then I spent the rest of the day in holding, having some great conversations in between reading On The Loose by Tara Janzen. I dunno why, but I just couldn’t concentrate on reading. Oh well. Another good day over all.

Luckily, the wardrobe for both shoots was about the same, so all I had to do was add a couple shirts, jackets and a pair of pants to my gig bag before I went to sleep around 2AM. We surprisingly got out a little after 1AM. I was still going to be sleep-deprived, but I wasn’t the only one and the extra hours of sleep definitely helped.

I got to the set on time and went through the usual rigmarole. The weather was awfully gloomy and threatening to rain some more. I was trying to keep as much of a sunny disposition as I could. It wasn’t their fault I’d been stuck on a late shoot the night before.

The wardrobe lady loved my stuff and that truly made my day. She excitedly tugged at a couple of my shirts and a jacket and said, "Is this vintage?!" I replied, "Yeah. It used to be a dress, but I opened it up to be a jacket." She tugged on it, "Great! Wear that over whatever else you want in order to keep warm."

I didn’t have much to go under it, so I just grabbed an extra shirt and put it on over the one I was wearing. I’d come prepared with one of my heaviest coats. I was good to go…despite my awful habit of wanting to lay down and close my eyes. The blacktop was looking so comfortable…

Anyway, we hopped in a van to go to the set and the incredibly awesomely nice PA started placing us. (I really wish more PAs could be like him. He was so nice and without a bad attitude toward us extras. I really appreciated it after the hell I had on Raising The Bar.) I followed him as he set up crosses for people to do and since I’d been holding a book said, "If you want, I can just sit somewhere in frame and read. If that’d work."

He liked the idea and sat me on a bench behind where the action was to take place. I tell ya, my mental capacity at this point probably couldn’t have handled a cross, so sitting on that bench, reading was perfect. I even made sure I wasn’t static when the cameras were rolling. I was just so thankful to be there, doing that on a day when I was really off my game like that.

I even sat there between takes, between setups, the entire time. I didn’t bother going to holding. I mean, whether I read on the park bench or read in holding didn’t really matter. Plus, I had my feet up on the bench and since there was only a chair in holding, it wasn’t as comfy.

Okay, now, here’s the surreal part of this gig. Imagine all the sleep-deprivation creating a good fog in my brain… I’m reading a book because that was about the extent of the actions I could perform on such low energy… And the scene…well…the two lead actors were shouting "Penis!" at the top of their lungs.

Y’know, when two young kids are just having cute fun together kissing and goofing off in between. Well, that’s what the scene happened to be. I don’t know why they were repeatedly yelling "Penis!", but it does make me want to see the movie in order to find out. Plus, there’s a pretty good chance I’ll make it into the finished product due to my static location.

So, there you have it… The day I spent in a haze, on a park bench, reading a book while the scene revolved around two people yelling "Penis! PENIS! PeeeeeeNIS! PEEnis! PEEENIIIS!!!"

I love being an extra. The truth is almost always waaaaaaaay stranger than fiction.

I parked in the lot next to the ocean—which was nifty because I don’t get to see the ocean every day and I was a little early. Even though it was really cold, listening to the surf while I sat in my car was nice.

Considering the bad time I’d had on my last show, my hopes weren’t high on this one, but when I got there, they’d had a whole enclosed trailer for us extras—climate controlled, too! We all had both chairs AND tables, too.

And they even made sure we got fed before heading to the wardrobe line. When I got there and it started to rain, they brought out tents for us so we wouldn’t get too wet. Now that’s an awful lot of icing on my cake and I hadn’t even gotten to the set yet.

When the costumer looked at me, she decided that I should change into a different outfit, but she wanted me to come back once I’d changed. When I came back, she looked me up and down and then got distracted so I thought I was done and headed over to the hair and makeup tents. About two minutes into having my makeup done, a PA came over and told me I had to go back to wardrobe.

All I could think of was: Uh-oh…

And sure enough, she wanted me to change again, but she said she “had something for me”.

All I could think of was: Uh-oh…again.

There were an awful lot of thin, short, low-cut sundresses being worn and I really didn’t want to get stuck freezing in one of those… in the rain, too, even though the shot took place indoors, we still had to walk a half block to get where we were going.

But then, the costumer brought out this totally awesome vintage jumpsuit. The kind of thing I’d normally wear. She was excited to have someone wear it. Granted, it really was small, but it fit me perfectly. I guess I was born in the wrong era. Lots of vintage stuff fits me waaaay better than contemporary.

Anyhow, so I was suited up and ready for work…

Which was nothing different from anything else I’ve done—a bunch of crossing through frame—however, the location was so small, there really wasn’t enough room for everyone and I ended up sandwiched between a pole, the script supervisor, the monitors and a camera dolly.

In other words, hell for an extra.

You don’t want to be in the way, but you are. You don’t want to be near monitorland, but you are. You don’t want to get run over by the camera dolly, but you might. You don’t want to get hit by the boom mic operator, but you might. And you especially don’t want to be in the way when the principal actors are trying to talk to the director, but you are.

And you’re bracing yourself the whole time for the gigantic chewing out…but it never came. In fact, they were all really nice and understanding about the close quarters. It was amazing.

Then again, I’d come off of a pretty bad show, so when someone was nice to me, it really stood out.

So, I spent the next eight or nine hours walking through frame, pretending I was drinking a martini—which was water with olives, but whatever. My feet did eventually get tired, but I looked great.

And due to my position stuffed in that impossible corner…let me just say that Paul Rudd has the kind of smile where when it happens (which is thankfully quite often), the whole world seems a happier place. Yeah, I…umm…well…I melted. I just couldn’t help it. He had that effect on me. What a great little gig.

Finally, we got to a change where instead of walking through frame, they had me seated…right behind the hero table. My back is to the action, but I’m betting when all is said and done, I’ll be in at least one frame of the movie. That’s always nice.

For the last few hours, Paul Rudd and Jason Siegel were just ad-libbing back and forth and good golly, there were a few times they were so hilarious that it was hard no to laugh. They were amazing. Amazing to experience their talents while joking in character. This was the first comedy I’ve done where it’s more than just the star (Will Farrell in Kicking & Screaming and Jim Carey in Yes Man) is doing the ad-libbing and I really enjoyed it. It broke the monotony.

The only problem with this shoot wasn’t even the fault of the shoot. About half way in—after we knew we’d likely be there until 2am—I learned I was booked on another show the following day…at 7:30am. Nice.

But then Paul Rudd smiled at me and everything was beautiful again. *sigh*

Good golly, it’s true though, I swear it.

Anyway, this was a two-day call. I played the assistant to the prosecutor in Episode 2 and was miraculously called back for this one, Episode 4.

Extras rarely get called back like this. I must’ve done something right somehow.

This show shoots about ten minutes from my house, so there was no hardship getting there, parking, and getting shuttled to the sound stages. I wore the only dark suit I have because that’s what wardrobe wanted, but they didn’t like my suit, so they gave me two others. That’s fine. I’m not picky.

The only bummer was that one of the suits had pants so long I needed to wear heels and they didn’t have my size…or if they did, they were buried. I ended up in three-inch heels that were a full size too big for me.

They were dangerous, but I made them work. I’ve walked in ill-fitting shoes before.

In the first shot of the morning, we were in the hallway outside the courtroom. I was instantly picked on for my purse which I’ll admit didn’t match my suit very well, but I’d forgotten to get it approved and it did match the other suit I was supposed to wear. It had been approved the last time I’d worked the show, so I knew it wasn’t the bag itself, it was the fact it didn’t match. Whatever.

The AD wanted me to put it back in holding, but I’m sorry, no. Especially not when there’s a plethora of hiding places off camera. I don’t want to be separated from my purse. Who knows what could happen? There are a lot of stories of things being stolen and I did not want my purse to be the stuff of a story like that. After much back and forth, we put it in the room off camera. I felt bad for having to argue, but I had no choice. I wasn’t going to be separated from it.

Then, I was handed a briefcase. I tried to explain that props may already have one in the courtroom for me. Last time, I had a filebox and a stack of folders. I didn’t want to end up with a pile of briefcases this time.

Well, the same AD thought I was full of shit and just trying to be difficult. She did not understand that I was looking out for the continuity of the show because if the camera saw me walking in that hallway with that briefcase, that case would be married to me for the duration.

I argued a little and then she said this scene was different and the other AD told me to make sure that I’m facing away from the camera and that I’m covered by another of the extras when I do my cross. At that point, I considered it a mini-victory. Yeah, I was stuck with the briefcase, but they understood why I was being difficult, it was for the better of the show. They had my back to the camera and mostly covered so that I wouldn’t be recognized playing a role other than who I was inside the courtroom.

Okay, so once we were in it, that shot went off okay and it was time to work in the courtroom.

I took my place at the prosecutor’s table like usual. The props guys used the briefcase I’d been carrying in the other scene. I was fine with that and having a great time.

There was a different director this time, but the one from last time was there, too. I guess maybe he was producing this episode instead. At one point, I smiled at him just to say hello and he told me that I was “allllllllllll over episode 2″ and “call all your friends and family over and bust out the popcorn”.

So, everyone out there who wants to actually spot me in one of these shows, watch for me in the second episode of Raising The Bar. Apparently ya can’t miss me in the courtroom scenes!

Okay, so the day dragged on as usual. I spent much of my time in the hallway outside the courtroom. I ended up sitting on the wooden prop benches because I knew I wasn’t allowed on any of the canvas directors’ chairs. That was fine, even though painful. My ill-fitting shoes gave me blisters and I almost tripped a few times, but for the most part, I was okay.

During the coverage of the prosecutor’s table, in one of the setups, they did a two-shot (which is exactly as it sounds…the cameras have both Marcus and myself in frame) and then they were doing Marcus’ closeup, but it was intricate because he had to stand up for part of the scene and there was no way to have two people in the frame. The director actually told them to put one camera on each of us. Holy schnitzel!!!!!! The moment was priceless for me. I doubt it’ll be used in the finished product, but to have it done in the first place was awesome.

The cameras were about three feet from us. The first time, on episode 2, I was intimidated and terrified, but because I’d survived that, I knew I’d be able to do it again.

And I did.

The rest of the day went fairly well. Much of the same even though it was getting ridiculously hot in there. I mean, like, 80 indoors. I was okay, though, for some reason, even in my suit.

The next day, I realized that wardrobe hadn’t liked any of my suits, so I left them at home. Sadly, I forgot my bag of shoes which was right next to my suits. Doh! I knew there’d at least be the ill-fitting pair if nothing else…

But when I got to wardrobe and he asked me why I didn’t come wearing a suit, I explained that he’d seen all my suits and couldn’t use them. At first, he huffed, but then realized that I’d at least tried because I’d brought a couple shirts that might work under another suit. He picked one of those and gave me one of the suits I’d worn last time.

Then, I realized I’d forgotten to bring that pile of shoes I’d set aside. I was mortified. I expressed such to the wardrobe guy. Of course he wasn’t thrilled at first, but after awhile I think he realized that I really was embarrassed and really did just forget to bring the bag of shoes with me. Plus, there were plenty to choose from under the truck…and this time, we even found my size. Yay!

This day, it was more of a sandwich for me. I worked a lot in the morning and a lot at the end of the day, but in the middle, I was in the hallway most of the time because they’d wanted me to stay close. I was stuck on those godforsaken wooden benches.

In the morning, there was a point when the DP told me that I looked really pretty on film. He’d seen the dailies from episode 2 and I’d looked really pretty. I was flattered, but honestly, he’s the Director of Photography. He’s the one who made me look pretty, so I told him it was all his fault and thanked him. I don’t think he’d had an actor tell him that before.

Oh, by the way, I love J. August Richards. He plays Marcus McGrath and is so awesome. He really is. He even helped me through some of the coverage of our table. See, there are rules about what a director can say to an extra without having to upgrade the extra to a day player. Honestly, I don’t care about all that crap, I just want to get the eyeline right so that I’m looking where Marcus is looking when we’re supposed to be listening to the judge or whoever’s talking. No one would talk to me, but Marcus did and for that I’m so appreciative.

Things went well during the first part of the day, but during that middle section, my ass was starting to hurt something fierce. First it fell asleep and I had to walk around to wake it up. Then, the bones started to hurt. But 1) I couldn’t go far and 2) couldn’t sit anywhere else. After a few hours of sheer pain, I finally decided I needed a break and I wasn’t going to stand up in 3-inch heels for any length of time if I could avoid it.

So, there was no one around and all of the cast directors’ chairs were empty save one very nice day player. I figured I’m almost cast. I don’t have a line, but I’m featured in frame. There’s no one around. I’ll just sit in a cast chair for a few minutes to hopefully get my ass to quit hurting. If someone important needs to sit there, I’ll jump up immediately. I wasn’t even leaning back in the chair.

I was there for about two minutes before the AD who’d argued with me before starts yelling at me: “OH NO, NO, NO! YOU CAN’T SIT THERE. WE HAVE TO HAVE SOME PROTOCOL AROUND HERE. YOU’RE JUST AN EXTRA. YOU CAN’T SIT THERE. OTHER EXTRAS ARE GOING TO START THINKING THAT THEY CAN, TOO.” she kept going, but I’d already gotten up at the first “Oh no”.

As she yelled, I explained that I was only sitting there because it was more comfortable and I was in pain. And get this, I was sitting in the chair DIRECTLY next to a bench. It was utterly ridiculous. I moved the six inches over to the bench, still in shock. She finally quit yelling at me, but I was humiliated. Utterly humiliated. She could’ve just said, “Hey, don’t sit there.” or even “You know you shouldn’t sit there.” and I would’ve moved.

(On many shows, no one cares who sits in the cast chairs as long as the chairs become available when necessary. I’ve never sat in them, but I’ve seen other extras sit in them. I’ve sat in them as a stand-in, though and have been invited to sit in them by cast members and producers before. It’s just a freakin’ chair. I have certainly NEVER seen an extra get CHEWED out like I was for sitting in one. I’ve seen them told not to sit there, but NEVER yelled at for it.)

Trying to fix the awkward situation and maybe ease it, the day player whispered, “You can sit in my chair. I don’t mind.” But I declined. I was about ready to cry anyway and I didn’t want to be yelled at anymore. I don’t do well with humiliation like that.

I guess the AD thought that I thought I was as ‘good’ as the cast and ‘privileged’ enough to sit in the cast chairs, but that wasn’t it at all. Not even remotely. My ass hurt. And I ended up so humiliated, I could hardly keep from crying. This is why I’m background, not featured. I don’t like the center of attention…especially in negative situations. I don’t do well in confrontations and being humiliated.

So, there I was, my ass hurting as well as my pride and the coverage of my table still hadn’t been shot. I could hardly keep myself together and somehow I was supposed to act like I was following the case and totally absorbed in it. I almost asked to go home because no matter how I tried to get back into it, I just couldn’t pull myself back together.

But then we broke for lunch which gave me a break from being near the set. I talked to another extra during lunch. She was really sweet and I hope I see her again. She shared a story about a friend of hers who was booked as an extra and ended up with a speaking role. I shared the story about how I got chewed out for sitting in a cast chair. Even she was shocked. The PAs on this show were really cool, really nice, real advocates for our comfort, too, but now that I think about it, they also had an underlying attitude that extras are stupid and should be treated as such.

Whatever.

After lunch, I was together enough to do the scene. I wasn’t at 100%, but I was close enough to pull myself together.

While we were waiting to do the scene, I ended up talking to J. August Richards. And I couldn’t keep from mentioning what had happened and how I didn’t want it to jeopardize my chances of coming back. He saw that I knew what I did was wrong and that it was the fact I was chewed out for it, not politely asked not to sit there and really felt for me. He liked having me as his assistant, I guess. He said he didn’t think that what I’d done would keep me from coming back. I reminded him I’m an extra. Nothing’s set in stone.

We did our coverage and then I went back to the wicked, hard bench. Also, by now, the set was heating up. Literally. It was easily over 85 degrees in there. I was starting to get light-headed and needed a lot of water and to use the little girls’ room.

When I came back, one of the stand-ins was sitting in my chair. When I went to replace her (I’d worked with her on Changeling), she told me that I could rest for a little while because it was hot. That was so sweet of her. I went back out to the bench and tried to get my sanity back. It was freakin’ hot.

And, of course, guess who started yelling again and made me go back in there.

Now, normally, I didn’t mind standing in for myself even though stand-ins make more money than extras. I didn’t bitch about not being paid proper rate or anything like that. Hell, I could call SAG and get them in trouble. I don’t usually mind standing in for myself, but dammit, I was about to pass out and worried that my makeup was melting.

The makeup lady came by to touch me up and I asked her about it. She said that I handled it well and didn’t look bad at all. I thanked her and told her I trusted her even though I felt like I looked awful, if she said I looked good, then I wasn’t going to stress it. And honestly, that made a huge difference. I didn’t want to appear unhealthy during my coverage. That would look bad on the show. I don’t care about the way I look as long as I look right for the part.

So J and I did our coverage. He was sweltering, too, but they let him use a little personal fan. Honestly, his suit was warmer than mine. He needed the extra cooling.

After that, I went back to the dreaded bench. And as I look back at the day, something must’ve happened. When I first got there and the day was new, everyone was treating me not necessarily like one of the cast, but at least with a little respect. By the time I got chewed out, I was scum and I don’t know why.

Once I was signed out, I thanked the PA who took care of us extras and headed outside to catch a shuttle back to my car. J waved at me and I couldn’t help but run over to him and give him a hug. I didn’t know if I’d ever see him again. He seemed to think I would, but just in case, I wanted to tell him what a pleasure it was to work with him and all that. I mean, he’s really that awesome and I wanted to tell him that.

All in all, it was the best of times, it was the worst of times…

I have no idea if I’ll ever be called back on that show. They can’t use me on a jury or in the gallery because I was so featured, so if I ever get called back, it’d be as Marcus’ 2nd again. That’d be great. I’d love to come back, but honestly, if I’m going to be treated like shit, I’ll happily give up the featured part and everything. I don’t need the money that badly.

When are people going to learn that if you treat us like stupid fucking extras, we’re gonna act like stupid fucking extras and not want to help out the production at all. We’ll fuck off, we’ll mouth off, we’ll be difficult to work with. We tend to mirror the treatment we receive.

When I went into this, I wanted to give 110% of myself. Now, I want to give zero, but I’ll do it anyway and probably not be happy about it, which will undoubtedly show in my onscreen and offscreen performance unintentionally.

Treat people with respect and they return it…even stupid fucking extras like myself.

This was still the time of my life. Too bad it got tainted the moment I got chewed out for sitting in a chair. I swear, I’ll never do it again. Hell, us extras are hardly allowed on the furniture anyway. We’re all such animals, y’know…

I guess the whole movie is a spoof of dance movies done by the Wayans brothers.

Anyhow, I’d already gone to a fitting for the 1960s clothes, but the wardrobe line was long because there were a lot of us on the call. Eventually, I got my really cute dress and survived hair and makeup.

The morning was really cold, but I knew it’d warm up. I used my fleece blanket until we were called to set. I ended up being placed near the professional dancers. They were awesome.

So, I spent the day dancing (not really dirtily—that was optional.) We were there for about thirteen hours, so needless to say, I was exhausted by the time we got out of there.

I wish I had more to say, but honestly, aside from how funny the scene will be in the movie, it was just another scene to me. I probably got some camera time since I was so close to some of the professional dancers, though. That’d be fun. I haven’t been in other farces like this spoof movie.

I was a public defender in the pilot. I was booked as a public defender again, but when I got there and the AD was signing us in, I noticed my name was separated out all by itself near the court reporter and clerks. As I got further through the line, I saw that I was supposed to be “Marcus 2nd”. What the hell did that mean?!?

In essence, I was instantly terrified. As far as I knew, I was about to be paraded around naked. No, wait. That’s a role I could figure out on the fly…

Anyway, I stressed all the way through check-in, all the way to the wardrobe line and then even more when I was pulled out of line because apparently I was someone important that might be needed on the set first or something, so they cut me in front of the rest of the extras. Aaaack! I hate it when that happens.

It took three tries. None of the suits I brought were appropriate for what they needed and two of the suits they gave me didn’t work right either. During all of this, I heard, “She’s going to be right there at the table the whole time. Right next to Marcus.” And the Costume Designer was being exceptionally picky.

Great, so I was about to be playing a heavily featured role that I didn’t know how to do. Nice.

I readied myself for the snake pit and dove right in.

Sure enough, I was seated in the courtroom, at the prosecutor’s table. Then my one big moment happened… The guy who was clearly the legal consultant walked by. I gathered up the courage to flat out ask him what it was that I was supposed to do. Do I take notes? What?

I was to be the prosecutor’s assistant. I was to do whatever the prosecutor wanted me to do. Note taking was optional.

Finally, there was meaning in my life. I knew my purpose. Everything was going to be okay. Well, mostly. There’s still that bit about being featured and having to act.

Why was I freaking out so much? I’m a background ACTOR, so why should this be so crazy to me?

Well, because I’m not ‘looking for my big break’ or ‘wanting to be a star’ or any of that kind of stuff. I just want to be part of the Hollywood magic and hopefully be in frame in the finished product so I can do a screen capture and put a little arrow pointing to me. Y’know, being recorded as part of history even if no one outside of this blog knows that tiny little blur is me. I don’t have big aspirations. If it happens, great, but I’m not going to seek it out. I don’t have that kind of stamina and rejection as a writer is hard enough. Rejection as an actor is far more personal.

There are several actors who would’ve been instant hams in my particular situation, too, and mentally rehearsed lines they’d make up and try to slide in so they could get paid more or try to show off like this was an on-the-job audition.

I’m not that kind of girl. I was there to be the prosecutor’s assistant and not steal his show. I was to work with him, not over him…and also not make him look like an idiot for supposedly hiring me.

That’s where all the nerves come from. But once we were rolling during the first take, I realized that mostly I’d be listening to the court case. There wasn’t much interaction necessary between Marcus and I. And what was necessary was on his lead, not mine.

So I went with that and everything grew from there. I started to scowl at the other lawyer, I got engrossed in the testimonies, I silently rooted for Marcus whenever he was addressing the jury or questioning a witness. It was awesome. For a role I had no idea how to play, I got it figured out pretty damn well if I do say so myself. (I just hoped I impressed the director, too…)

After much of the testimony of the three witnesses was done, there were still turnarounds to do…and then my chance to really shine. I gotta admit that sitting at a table with two big cameras about three feet from my face–which moved back and forth and side to side during the take–was both terrifying and exhilarating. Both the hair and make-up people had been touching me up between takes all day and that really boosted my confidence because at least I knew I was looking my best…now if I could just act my best, too, without looking fake…

In college, I majored in Theater Design and Technology. Basically, what that entails is about three-quarters of the acting classes that Actors had to take plus a few specialized stagecraft classes. In those acting classes, I was always near the top of the class. Aspiring actors used to ask me how I did so well since I didn’t even wanna be an actor when I grew up.

I flat out told them the truth: “I just go up on that stage and get the assignment done. I’m there to do a job. No more, no less. I don’t care what I look like or how I’m doing. I don’t care about any of that. I just get the job done according to what the teacher wants.”

My own advice paid off… That plus a little bit of paying attention when I watch movies and stuff. Ever notice how when they cut to someone who’s listening, they always use the clips where the person scratches his nose, shifts in his chair, sniffs, rolls his eyes, bites his lip, swallows, tilts his head, etc.? With that bit of knowledge in my head, my advice to myself about a job to be done and an interior monologue about the case at hand going through my head, I was good to go.

And then it finally hit me pretty hard that it was a two-shot with myself and Marcus. He knew the script. He had worked through his character. He was being directed. As an extra, if the director directs me, they have to pay me more money, so directors usually stay away from background actors. Sometimes, they have the 1st AD relay direction, but only when it’s really necessary. Good enough is good enough when it comes to extras.

This being a two-shot suddenly had me scared again. We were to be looking slightly to the right, so that put Marcus out of my peripheral vision. I’d be mostly winging it, so hopefully he’d make a few big movements so that I could sort of copy them. Not exactly, but if he shook his head, I at least wanted to match him with a scowl or rolling my eyes…something that had the same sort of connotations. That way we looked like a team–two people who had put a ton of work into this case together.

As soon as I heard “Action!” I just started making it all work. I did the best I could to match Marcus. I went really deep into my character…and realized that my shoulders were somewhere up by my ears because I was so stiff. How did that get past my mental inventory? Well, since I didn’t give a shit about what I looked like, I made that tension work, too and shifted at an appropriate spot and did a few other movements–even played with my pen a little.

That first ‘listening’ take was crazy, but I could tell by the director’s smile and the excitement of the camera operators plus the Director of Photography introducing himself to me between takes that I must’ve done something right. Yay! Go me!

Two solid minutes of nothing but listening can seem like an eternity–especially when you have to react to words you’ve heard a million times as though it’s the first time you’ve heard them. It gets hard to fight the anticipation sometimes.

Good golly, I was so thrilled. I mean, what was supposed to be just another extra gig had turned into so very much more and I’m so glad for that. I really am. It’s these little things that really spur me on, keep me going back to face the hours of boredom or the comments like “Stupid fucking extras…” and waiting until the crew goes through the lunch line before us extras are allowed to eat. It’s the kind of adventure I thrive on. It’s why I have been doing this for the past five years.

As a general note on this gig, though, I just gotta mention that another personal record was set for me. The trial took place over the course of four days…three of which were being shot on the same day…which means that us extras had to have three different outfits. This was a first for me to have three outfits that required an area for me to change in rather than just putting on a jacket or taking it off. The other part of this first is kind of funny.

Due to how long it takes to move cameras and rearrange a room to cheat stuff to look right in frame, sometimes, they’d leave the cameras in place and have everyone go change clothes. I swear it, we must’ve changed clothes at least thirty times by the end of the day. It got so hectic at one point, that I forgot which was which and changed into the wrong outfit. I had to ask the wardrobe people because I felt wrong, but couldn’t figure out what I was supposed to be wearing. After that, I started going by who was on the witness stand rather than what scene or what day it was because I just couldn’t keep them straight!

I’m betting that’ll make for a good story for all of us extras when we’re in holding on whatever show we work next. We’ll all have an “On Raising The Bar, we had to change clothes a million times” story to share in exchange for a “On War of the Worlds, Tom Cruise refused to work until production put heaters in the extras holding tents because we were freezing” story.

That’s another thing I love about being an extra. The stories are fascinating…and I’ve lived some of them!

Oh yeah, and the other surprise for the day was that I was to be recalled for the following day. Yay!

While the make-up lady was putting my face on, she said, “I just gotta say that you looked really pretty on camera yesterday. You did really good. The way you were lit… You looked really great.” I was stunned. I couldn’t believe my ears. I mean, yeah, the director shook my hand and thanked me at the end of the day and that was really, really, really freakin’ cool, but no one said anything about my performance or how I looked. I just figured that since I wasn’t being yelled at or directed, I must be at least passable…y’know, for a stupid fucking extra.

Then, she said, “And over by the monitors, one of the people there said, ‘Who’s she? The camera’s all over her? Does she have any lines?’ and when they said no, he was really surprised. ‘She’s really good.’” Yeah, I was beyond the valley of ready to do happy dance cartwheels. For a role I didn’t know how to play and didn’t even know I’d be playing it until about an hour before I did it, that ain’t too shabby a thing to say.

However, that also meant I had to do a repeat performance. No pressure or anything…

And at least the second day I didn’t have to change clothes. That was such a relief! The first day, my suits were polyester, but this second day, I was wearing wool and thought I was going to pass out from the heat a few times when I couldn’t take the jacket off. At least it was a skirt suit. That helped a little.

I did more listening and there were a few times when Marcus leaned over to say stuff to me. That was fun. Also, when the verdict was read and we won the case, it was fun to react a little, too.

But the absolute most difficult shot of the whole two days was the shot where Marcus and I leave. He and the other lawyer have some lines while we’re picking up our paperwork and stuff. Somehow, miraculously, I was able to carry my purse, a legal-size, inch-thick accordion file and two of those file box briefcases…and do it like it’s no big deal…and get through the swinging rail and out another door.

Somehow, it all worked out and I didn’t disrupt the scene too much, but wowie, now that was acting! I can’t imagine what it would’ve been like if those file boxes had been full. Ah well. That’ll make for another good story to tell while in holding next time I hear someone talking about how much stuff they had to carry in a scene.

Keep your fingers crossed that I get to work on this show again. Sometimes, they don’t bring extras back if they’ve been featured. Hopefully, I’ll get a recurring role as Marcus’ assistant throughout the series. That would kick ass, but I’m not gonna hold my breath. *sigh*

But this time, they didn’t get mad. They gave me a pair. So, I’m bagging them up and stashing them in the bottom of my gig bag just in case…so I can keep helping out the wardrobe people since the only time I wear panty hose is on set.

It’s been awhile since the last time I didn’t really know what to write about a show. Sometimes, I spend hours bored. Sometimes, I spend hours doing something monotonous. Sometimes, I never even make it onto the set, but there’s still tons to write about.

This time, there isn’t much to report except that I was nervous as hell because I was a waitress. On other shows like this, they have the waitresses visit ten tables, do fifteen things, hit marks on barely audible lines. It’s insanity. I was worried I’d end up like that, too.

But they used the other two waitresses in the first set-up.

Then, they almost used me in the next one.

Then, I was going to work the one after that, but it changed.

I knew I’d be in the next one for sure, though. I was the only one who hadn’t been seen.

And it was so quick, I only had time to literally work from table to table pretending to ask how everyone was. I carried no menus, never whipped out the order pad, nothing.

Oh, wait… On the turnaround, I did get to deliver one drink, but that was literally it. The amount of time it took to get that drink to the table, turn and walk out of frame was about the entire length of the shot.

I’m counting myself very, very lucky.

Between one of the set-ups, I went out to use the port-a-potty and on my way back in the restaurant, I came around the corner and surprisingly ended up making good, solid, dreamy eye contact with Paul Rudd. I did a mini mental swoon and looked away for fear I might get in trouble (some actors get upset because it disrupts their concentration) and then realized that Paul didn’t seem like that kind of a guy and it was between shots, he was just relaxing.

It was a legitimate smile moment no matter who he was, so I should’ve just done it even though I might’ve accidentally drooled, and then darnit all…the moment was gone…never to return. *sigh*

But let me just say that my little split second staring into his eyes was a tiny wonderful slice of heaven. *sigh…swoon…sigh*

After the restaurant stuff was done, we went to a bowling alley where I was switched out to just regular background…Deep background, no less. So deep that I have no idea what the scene was about.

After a few million walk-through-frames, I got to go home. All in all, definitely not a bad gig.

I was a “Narcotics Support Group” member with my car (’06 Mustang, this time.) for two days on Criminal Minds.

The location was a church and there were very few signs as to whether I was in the right place or not. I was about an hour early, but usually there’s at least one sign as I near the location. This time, it wasn’t until I got to the set that I saw a sign. It was also a little difficult to get to from the directions I was given. But that’s one of the reasons I like to go early…just in case.

I parked on the set, got shuttled to base camp to go through wardrobe. Very cool wardrobe people on this gig.

Then we were taken back to holding in the basement of the church complex. It was a little creepy and weird, but not as bizarre as other places I’ve been in. Anyway, I read Shadows of Darkness by Brian McIntyre and John Zaffis. It’s true stories of demonic possessions and various other supernatural weirdness. I dig that kind of stuff. Plus, I met John Zaffis at a ghost hunt on the Queen Mary last month and really liked what he had to say.

So, I sat in holding until it was time for us to work…in a sort of mini-theater. There was a podium up front and a bunch of folding chairs set up. Since I was apparently a former drug addict, I sat in the audience. I know I got on camera, but I have no idea if I’ll make it into the finished product. I don’t want to give away any of the story, but from what I saw, the episode looks really, really good.

At one point while I was seated, two ADs were whispering and pointing while looking at me. I got a little nervous, but not too much. I knew I wasn’t doing anything wrong, so I just continued on with the scene and my participation in it. Finally, one of the ADs came over and said that I was being considered for a sort of upgrade tomorrow. Cool. I found out later that I was the same size and looked a lot like a day player who would be in the following day, so they wanted to use me as a stand-in. Great.

After a yummy lunch, my car worked while I sat enjoying the nice night. It was only a little cold–nothing my jacket couldn’t keep at bay. I finished the Zaffis book.

The next day, I came back for more fun and games. I parked my car, got some lunch and then was immediately pressed into action as a stand-in. Before lunch, I stood in for “Woman #1″, “Woman #2″ and “Smoker” (who didn’t actually smoke, but whatever) which actually gave me the title of Utility Stand-in because I stood in for so many characters–2 of which were blonde. It’s always fun for me when I get thrust into positions I never thought I’d be in. I truly enjoy the adventure.

After lunch, all of the day players were done, so I was mostly there because they were using my car in the parking lot. I stood around a lot, sat around a little and then it was time for the car stunt.

It was pretty simple really. The driver rammed a car into a cargo container. It was enough to have the kind of safety meeting I wrote in Driven to Distraction (by Ashleigh Raine) and I haven’t been on a set in awhile where we were doing anything that involved a real safety meeting, so that was fun for me. I like to watch the coordination process between what the driver does, the Special Effects guys as well as the Medics and Stunt Coordinator.

And actually, I almost forgot something… After going through the lunch line, most of the chairs were taken in the catering tent, but there was one on the corner of a group of four or five guys. I read “SFX” on one walkie-talkie and figured that’d be a fun group of guys to sit with even if I didn’t say anything and just listened.

I was so right.

I won’t repeat the stories I heard, but let’s just say it was well worth the price of admission. At the end, the guys laughed and said I probably didn’t know what I was getting into when I sat down. I replied, “No. I did. That’s why I sat here.” but I don’t know if they quite believed me.

That’s okay, though. I had a great time on this show. The crew was one of the nicest, most awesomest I’ve worked with in a long time. All the extras were treated with respect and everyone had fun–including the director!